Why I Started Hosting Retreats (And What It Taught Me About My Own Confidence)

It started with a whisper, and honestly? I was terrified. The idea of gathering a group of people, strangers, really, and asking them to trust me with their time, their energy, their weekend felt huge. But there was this quiet pull. A voice that kept saying, “What if you just tried?” So I did. And it changed everything.

The First Retreat Was a Mess (In the Best Way)
I over-planned, under-slept, and worried about every detail. Then people showed up. And somewhere between the first awkward icebreaker and the last round of goodbyes, something clicked. People were connecting. Laughing. Crying (the good kind). And I realized, I didn’t need to be perfect. I just needed to create space. That was the first lesson: confidence isn’t about having it all figured out. It’s about being willing to hold the door open for others.

Every Retreat Teaches Me Something New
Each one is different. Some are loud and chaotic, full of dance circles and late-night talks. Others are quiet and tender, with long walks and deep conversations. And every time, I learn something about myself, what I’m capable of, what I’m afraid of, and how much I can grow when I’m surrounded by people who are growing too.

The Confidence Part (The Surprise)
I thought hosting was about giving. And it is, but it’s also receiving. Seeing people show up as themselves, take risks, be vulnerable, it gave me permission to do the same. I started standing taller. Speaking more honestly. Trusting my instincts. The retreats became a mirror: every time I helped someone else feel brave, I felt braver too.

What It Taught Me
Confidence isn’t a destination. It’s a practice. It’s showing up even when you’re nervous. It’s saying “I don’t know” and learning alongside everyone else. It’s watching a group of strangers become a community and realizing you helped build that. It’s messy and beautiful and totally worth it.

So Why Do I Keep Hosting?
Because every retreat reminds me that we’re all just looking for connection, and that the person holding the door open gets just as much out of it as the people walking through.